Sequence Matters

"My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires." — James 1:19-20 (NIV)

I remember clearly my 15-year-old self behind the wheel for the first time. Mr. Hardwick, my algebra teacher/driver’s training instructor, sat beside me with a calm but watchful presence. Before I could turn the key, he asked the same three questions every time:

• Did you adjust the seat?

• Did you fasten your seatbelt?

• Did you check your mirrors?

Only after this sequence was complete could the lesson begin. It wasn’t just routine—it was wisdom. Sequence mattered.

James, the brother of Jesus and leader of the early church in Jerusalem, offers another sequence that matters: “Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” I wonder if this rhythm of restraint was something he and Jesus heard around the dinner table growing up. Perhaps Mary and Joseph, steeped in the wisdom of Proverbs, taught their children that listening precedes understanding, and that anger rarely leads to good decisions.

James isn’t just offering etiquette—he’s offering formation. A way of being.

• Listening first is an act of humility. It says, “I don’t know everything, and I want to understand.”

• Speaking slowly is a discipline of discernment. It invites the Spirit to shape our words before they leave our lips.

• Being slow to anger? That’s a posture of peace in a world that rewards outrage.

In verse 20, James adds the why: “Because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.” Anger may feel righteous in the moment, but it often leaves behind a trail of broken relationships and hardened hearts. In contrast, God’s righteousness is relational, restorative, and rooted in love, not reaction.

This sequence—listen, speak, restrain—mirrors the way of Christ. Jesus, even when provoked, responded with grace. He listened to the cries of the hurting, spoke truth with compassion, and bore the weight of injustice without retaliation. To follow Him is to adopt His rhythm.

Lord, teach me the sacred sequence. Help me to listen with compassion, to speak with wisdom, and to hold my anger with grace. May my responses reflect Your righteousness, not my own impulses. Shape my heart to mirror Yours—patient, peaceful, and full of love. Amen.

Grace & Peace,

Pastor Tim